Bible · Christianity · community pool · community post · daily post · inspiration · marriage · New posts

Gamophobia

Good morning,

Straight to my letter to you today. I was in an evening service yesterday and we were listening to a message by BDHM and he was preaching about different forms of spirit of fears/disorders. MY goodness I knew I just had to tell you about it.

Below is the link to the message if you want to listen to it. He always does a better job at explaining these things. ⤵️⤵️

Spirit of Power, Love and Sound Mind Part 2 by BDHM

Scripture for the message is

2 Timothy 1 (Listen)

2 Timothy 1:7For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

So for those who haven’t googled today’s title yet to find out what on earth I’ll be talking about, here it is.

What is Gamophobia??? (According to google)

“Gamophobia is the fear of commitment, though it can also be the excessive, persistent, uncontrollable and irrational fear of marriage. It is derived from the Greek word Gamos which means marriage and phobos meaning fear.”

I have met a lot of people with all sorts of fears of marriage/commitment, such as…

A person is particularly scared of getting married, and I mean the idea of spending their whole life with a single person is daunting for them.

What causes Gamophobia???

It is typically looked at as only a man’s problem, especially because some find it hard to commit to one woman or even bring themselves to propose to their long term beloved. But I must point out, that a lot of women also suffer from it.

I mean a client was telling me the other day that a friend’s husband said he loves his wife but doesn’t understand why he can’t have turkey sometimes although he enjoys chicken.

You also find that these types of people, live with their partners, have children but never get married, because of the fear that marriage will curse the relationship or the other party will change and all sorts.

Some factors that causes it are personal insecurities (like being heart broken, not feeling adequate enough for their partners etc), financial status and other social factors that comes along with marriage.

Even if they do manage to get married, these thoughts and fears are still lingering around. It can develop into domestic violence, pushing the other partner away, false accusations and so on.

Gamophobia occurs sometimes when the person didn’t witness good marriages around them. So this has left a bad taste in their mouth.

In my research I read that these incidents can be caused by divorce of parents during childhood, abuse from parents, seeing one’s parents or other married couples fight and quarrel, a previous marriage failure, betrayal from partner or hearing about unsuccessful marriages extensively.

Treatment for Gamophobia

It can be treated with both therapy/counselling and medications. I will also add with a lot of prayer and spiritual counselling not just any counselling.

But like I always say, if you want to be healed you have to first admit and confess that you have a problem.

What I’m saying is, if you really want to overcome the fear of marriage/commitment, you desire/need to really be ready to overcome the fear, seek the right guidance from your senior ministers and take practical steps.

Let’s stop denying what is clear and right in front of us. We will be missing out on great things in life, that we are entitled to, that God has planned for us.

May our stubbornness and inability to seek for help not hinder us from our breakthrough.

Proverbs 29:1 “He who is often reproved, yet stiffens his neck, will suddenly be broken beyond healing.”

Everything that is a success in life takes a lot of work. So just like how you want to be successful in your job and personal life, you must be ready to put the same effort into your relationships/marriage.

Marriage is an unending school, it is like entering into an unknown territory. There is no manual.

That is why we must have faith and by the grace of God, I know you can overcome this fear, as long as you are willing to be healed from the spirit of Gamophobia. Amen.

Psalms 34:17

The righteous cry, and the LORD heareth, and delivereth them out of all their troubles.”

Be blessed 😇🙏😘

Yours always,

#myepistle…

Advertisements
Christianity · community pool · community post · daily post · New posts

Fear Controls You

Good morning,

I’m glad to be writing to you today. As you know I have been very lazy writing lately.

I am allowing my personal life to take centre stage right now. I guess it’s just a season. I know when I do have something important that God has laid in my heart for you, you will hear from me 😊.

But I just needed to write today. I woke up with this thought about fear.

You know fear is one of the things that stops us from progressing.

Firstly what does the dictionary mean by the word “FEAR”

* An unpleasant emotion caused by the threat of danger, pain, or harm.

A feeling of anxiety concerning the outcome of something or the safety of someone. The likelihood of something unwelcome happening. A mixed feeling of dread and reverence, ‘like the love and fear of God’

BDHM once said

“JUST LIKE FAITH COMES BY HEARING, FEAR ALSO COMES BY HEARING”

When I heard this quote that “fear comes by hearing”, it made perfect sense.

Fear doesn’t just come upon you, it starts with a thought developing or that voice inside you giving you negative thoughts or like someone saying something like,….

…You are not beautiful enough

…You haven’t achieved much in life

…Why aren’t you married yet?

…Don’t you think that dress looks tacky

…To make it in this industry it is hard

…As for me I don’t think it is possible

You see all these types of statements drives fear and doubts into us and causes us not to progress.

I mean who cares right! Gods timing and all, God knows best.

I used to be a victim of this, but glory to God, during my early days as a Christian, God gave me this scripture and whenever I feel like I am developing any form of fear or anxiety I just repeat this scripture to myself till I feel better.

2 Timothy 1:7, For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.

By the way if you didn’t know, this is my favourite scripture of all time.

I don’t have much to say than let us be careful of the types people we listen to, whom we allow to have a say or influence our thoughts and decisions. They can influence our thoughts and invite or awaken demons like fear inside us.

Be weary 🤔🤔 of people making passing comments. Focus on the word of God and His promises, because He’s got you.

Be blessed and till next time, yours always…😊

#myepistle…

Christianity · community pool · New posts · Uncategorized

Pray For The Other Woman

God morning,

Just a quick one today. My pastor was preaching last night and when he said this statement, I thought of you all.
He says: “Aren’t you tired of praying for yourself and not getting any results?” 

“Remember Job prayed for his friends and the Lord blessed him”. 

Jobs 42:1-17

10 And the Lord turned the captivity of Job, when he prayed for his friends: also the Lord gave Job twice as much as he had before.

We are so concerned about ourselves, what we want God to do for us. But how many times have we gotten up and prayed and fasted on a friends behalf, a friend,…

Who is jobless

Who isn’t married

Who desires to have a child

Who is not saved

Who is struggling financially 

Who is having marital issues

Who is having emotional and physiological issues

Who is struggling to pray 

Who is making the wrong decisions in life, and so on 

I do this occasional (fast and pray for a friend or other that cross my mind), without them knowing. 

Let us rise up together and really start practising what a true Titus woman is all about. 

Philippians 2:3-4, Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.

Be blessed as you intercede for the other woman. Make it a challenge today and start praying for your friends.  😇🙏😘. 

As always, this is…

#myepistletoyou…

Christianity · community pool · New posts · Uncategorized

Multitude Of Counsel.

Good morning,

***LONG POST ALERT***

I hope I don’t sound like I am ranting to you all this morning. 😊.

So sometime recently I posted as usual and a friend reposted it and someone else responded saying they didn’t understand what my post was about and also stated that why do people now adays think they can just take to social media and start talking.

Usually I would have been so upset by it and you know really feel so down about it. 

So I paused and asked myself this question. WHY DID YOU START THIS BLOG???

It definitely was not my own doing, because I tell you it takes great effort to do this blog and I’m not just doing it because I’m jobless. I think I’m quite a busy person to add more problems to my problems. I don’t make any money from this blog and I’m not doing it to become known, (if in the furture it happens then all glory to God).

As I was complaining to God about the whole thing, the Holy Spirit put it in my heart, that in the multitude of great counsel there is wisdom. He also reminded me that the day everyone likes you, then you are definitely not in my will.

Proverbs 11:14, Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counsellers there is safety.

You see there are too many people on this earth, they can never be enough messengers. Mr A might never here Messenger A’s teaching but will by the grace of God find Messenger B’s teaching, which I’ll bring healing and wisdom to solve their problems. 

Then in that moment I knew and was more confident in what I am doing on this blog. I have by the grace of God and the leading of the Holy Spirit helped so many and still doing so and I’m going to keep on doing so.

At the end of the day. The word of God is meant to set us free and bring healing unto us.

Psalm 107:20 He sent his word, and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions.


But you see not everyone who is in a high position, like a famous pastors wife, preacher, motivational speaker and so on, qualifies to advice. I believe the wisdom of God and experiences of life qualifies anyone to shed their light on a matter, and we can agree to disagree.

I know that people would rather listen to a big name like Oprah Winfrey and other big people because they are famous and look like they are filled with wisdom. 

Like I always tell you all “I DONT KNOW ANYTHING I AM JUST BEING LED AS I WRITE”.  But then I was recently in a meeting and one of our bishops said this statement and I was like wow I must address this issue.

He said: “Just because she is A pastor’s wife doesn’t mean she is spiritual and qualifies to lead the women”.

He went on to say “She might be a pastor’s choice, but not God’s choice to then qualify to be the leader of the women”.’ 

“Because maybe when the pastor chose her, they weren’t even born again. 
She should prove over time that she qualifies to advices not just because she’s the pastors wife”.

I just want to use today’s post to encourage anybody out there, if you know you are called, don’t let the so-called bigger people and all the people around you bring you down. If you are not called time will tell.

Remember this scripture…

Luke 4:18,The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he hath anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor; he hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised,

If you believe you are called to do whatever you are doing, stay true, strong and stay firm. Believe in your God who has chosen you and sooner or later your works will show.

Matthew 5:16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven. 

Bishop Dag said in one of his daily quiet times…

“Spiritual, emotional and psychological problems are the most difficult to solve. Doctors often struggle with these problems to no avail. The diagnosis and treatment of spiritual, emotional and psychological problems are the most difficult areas of medicine. But God has a solution. The solution is in His Word.

A daily dose of God’s powerful Word will bring healing to every inner wound. How was Jesus going to heal the broken-hearted? Through the Word of God! The Word of God has a way of healing us of our pain and wounds. God will touch you where it hurts if you will allow Him. He will heal you of every situation in your life.

God also heals our bodies. The Bible says that His words are life and health to the flesh (Proverbs 4:22). The flesh means the physical body . I would like to quote to you a very interesting article I read in Reader’s Digest:

“The notion that religious faith can promote physical wellbeing is not new. Most of us have heard of cases in which someone, seemingly by sheer faith and will, has miraculously recovered from a terminal illness or survived far longer than doctors thought possible. What is new is that such rewards of religion are becoming the stuff of science.”
It may sound difficult to believe, but God’s Word actually brings healing
to our physical bodies”.


Above all one of the great commands we were given in the bible as women was in…

Titus 2:3-5, which is the foundation on which this blog was built. So in that sense I am not apologetic for writing and I will keep doing so by the power invested in me by God through His Son Jesus Christ.

We need more people to rise up and write. Just like the world has so many people blogging about fashion, sex, relationships and so on. Let us also write with the influence of God like in the bible days to bring light, wisdom and healing to God’s people.


Be Encouraged. Let us keep spreading the word and thank God for all the great women and men sharing their wisdom. God will do the rest. 😇🙏😘


Blessings and as always this is…

#myepistletoyou…

Bible · Christianity · New posts · Uncategorized · Women · Word

All You Need!

Good morning,

It’s been too long, I have truly missed writing to you. But I needed the time off and now I get why. I wouldn’t bore you with  the detail until God wants me to talk about it to encourage someone one day.

——————————————————————-

2 Peter 1:3, God has granted to us everything we need for life and godliness through knowing Christ and trusting in His all-sufficient promises.

I have tried to start writing now for the past one week and kept feeling unready. So as I started to write this at exactly 4:10am this morning, while trying to pray and fall back asleep, I was thinking of all the young ladies in my life. I am sure as they read this, they would wonder whom am talking about. But you see I am talking to you all.

You see me as a role model because I give good advice, I sound wise and I come across collected and in charge by Gods grace of my life. But you see it didn’t happen overnight. I decided I truly wanted a change. I mean a complete change.

I was in my second year of uni when I was dating a young man with intentions of marriage. He became my worst nightmare. Another story for another day. But during this time I was looking for my next boyfriend, whom will make me feel better, a comforter, for someone to love me, for someone to want me.

But you see the Holy Spirit is the best comforter. 

John 14:26 – But the Comforter, [which is] the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.


Then I heard a voice say “I AM ALL YOU NEED”. I asked all I need? In that same instant the Holy Spirit made me realise, that Jesus is all I needed. Filled my heart with so much love, that I wept so hard and surrender my life to Him. He expressed to me that no man nor boyfriend could ever fill the void I was feeling.

So the change began by me….,

1.) I stopped drinking

2.) I stopped partying

3.) I stop wearing provocative clothing

4.) I stopped posing in pictures try to portray sexiness. 

5.) I stopped listening to worldly music 

6.) I learnt how to fall in love with God.

7.) I learnt to love myself 

And so on… and this is why you can look up to me as someone who’s got it all together. But what you don’t know is I am still constantly working on myself. As they say “Rome wasn’t built in a day”.

I have realised that I counsel you all every time but I sometimes don’t see the actual change that will better you for the good.

As I look through some picture post some had posted, I realised how can you flee from sexual lost, when your selfies looks like you are selling yourself as a sexual product. SOME OF, IF NOT ALL OF THE POSES ARE TOO EROTIC. I know we are in the days of people liking your sexy selfies. I will not be liking anyone of those pictures just to let you know. But I love you, and just trying to show you something.

YOU SAY YOU DONT WANT TO FORNICATE BUT YOU TAKE SELFIES SAYING I AM SEXUALLY AVAILABLE, I AM INTO SUCH THINGS.

Beauty is vain. 

Proverbs 31:30, Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.

We say we want to get married, but what kind of man are we attracting with those poses. What kind of message are we sending to our potential husbands. 
There is a saying in my language “Don’t make a boyfriend your husband and don’t mistakenly make a potential husband a boyfriend”. 

You keep falling back into those insecurities, loneliness, feeling of not being worthy because true change hasn’t come.

When you know your true worth in Christ, NO MAN WILL MAKE YOU FEEL UNWANTED. Because you will already know that you are God’s own special creation and you are made for greater things.

Psalm 139:14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

This is just to let you know I AM BACK! Please feel free to ask me to remove you from the broadcast. I am here for those who need me. God bless you and my love always. 😇🙏😘

All I Need by Hillsong

#myepistlestoyou!

Christianity · daily post · New post · New posts · Uncategorized · Women

Cry Of The Broken… #Betrayal ‼️

Good morning,

I believe you have all been well. So I know it’s been about nearly 2 weeks 😳😳😳😳. I didn’t think I could do without writing to you for one day. But I desperately needed the rest ya’ll. The same person who told me to start this, also told me to rest. I always try to be obedient 🙏🙈.

So as I was about to sleep last night,  causally preaparing myself, then the Holy Spirit dropped it in my heart that there is someone whom is making a big mistake with their reactions/actions from being betrayed. I heard the words You need to tell them NOW!!!

(This means I might not be fully back to my writing duties).

——————————————————————-


2 Corinthians 1:5 For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ.

What is a BETRAYAL???

Well according to wiki, “Betrayal is the breaking or violation of a presumptive contract, trust, or confidence by that produces moral and psychological conflict within a relationship amongst individuals, between organizations or between individuals and organizations.”

You see the loosing of trust and confidence hurts because the one whom betrayed you is never an enemy or stranger, it is usually the one whom you love.

The worst type of betrayal usually happens between a married couple. It is nearly impossible to come back from a marriage that suffered an act of betrayal. 

But you see, I believe it is either we decided to be honest with ourselves and totally agree to making it work or walk away and suffer the consequences. 

Because if we are not honest with ourselves, betrayal doesn’t only leave us heart broken, but it leaves a permanent blemish on our souls. It takes us to a dark and dingy place, a place filled with pain and hurts. 

You have to analysis yourself and see where you fell short and never let those things reapeat itself. The one who betrayed you is not the only one whom requires a change.

If you also get an opportunity to vent, take it and vent. Take time to be sure you still want in. 

Even Jesus took time praying in accepting if he still wanted in on going on the cross. 

Luke 22:41-42, And he was withdrawn from them about a stone’s cast, and kneeled down, and prayed, Saying, Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done.

Though he felt betrayed by his own to die for sinners like you and I, he took it because he understood and valued the long term benefit of staying in. He had geniueinly forgiven knowing he would be betrayed.

I know it’s easier said than done, as long as the other party is also genuinely willing to work hard at it, we also have to try our hardest. As Christian’s we quote this verse all the time…

Matthew 19:26 But Jesus looked at them and said to them, “With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

We must believe it and act upon it and believe we can be happy again in that relationship. It is hard to do anything on our own, but we must trust in the strength of God to help us. We can genuinely trust again and in deed “WITH GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE”.

I just want to encourage somebody today, there is still time to save the situation. Don’t be afraid. God’s got you.

Philippians 4:13 I am able to do all things through Him who strengthens me.

Love always 😇🙏😘.

Cry Of The Broken by Hillsong

#myepistle…

Christianity · daily post · New posts · Uncategorized

BREAK UPS

Good morning,

BREAK UPS

by Dag Heward-Mills 

READ: Matthew 19:1-9

19 And it came to pass that when Jesus had finished these sayings, He departed from Galilee and came into the region of Judea beyond the Jordan.

2 And great multitudes followed Him, and He healed them there

3 The Pharisees also came unto Him, testing Him and saying unto Him, “Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?”

4 And He answered and said unto them, “Have ye not read, that He that made them at the beginning made them male and female,

5 and said, ‘For this cause shall a man leave father and mother and shall cleave to his wife, and the two shall be one flesh’?

6 Therefore they are no more two, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.”

7 They said unto Him, “Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement and to put her away?”

8 He said unto them, “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, suffered you to put away your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.

9 And I say unto you, whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery; and whoso marrieth her who is put away doth commit adultery”.

God places the responsibility of cleaving on the man. He leaves and cleaves (glues) to his wife.

Genesis 2:24, Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.


Divorce occurs when he is not able to cleave tightly enough to become inseparable. Marriage rests on the shoulders of the man, just the same way divorce also does. 
Whatever happens in the home is the man’s responsibility, although it may not be his fault. When man fell and God came to the garden, He first called out to Adam and placed the responsibility for eating the fruit at his feet. There were no questions for the woman.
Divorce brings about many complications. God, generally, does not like broken fellowship of any sort. The concept of a broken home or broken life hurts God. An unending hurt is inflicted (Proverbs 17:14). A bitter personality is created (Proverbs 18:14). There is a permanent break up of relationship/fellowship (Proverbs 18:19).
Separation is the termination of a commitment with emotional involvement. Divorce is legalized separation. Do not make a marriage vow if you do not intend to keep it (Ecclesiastes 5:4, 5).


Be blessed and let us continue in love. 😇🙏😘

#myepistle…