Straight to my letter to you today. I was in an evening service yesterday and we were listening to a message by BDHM and he was preaching about different forms of spirit of fears/disorders. MY goodness I knew I just had to tell you about it.
Below is the link to the message if you want to listen to it. He always does a better job at explaining these things. ⤵️⤵️
Scripture for the message is
2 Timothy 1:77 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.
So for those who haven’t googled today’s title yet to find out what on earth I’ll be talking about, here it is.
What is Gamophobia??? (According to google)
“Gamophobia is the fear of commitment, though it can also be the excessive, persistent, uncontrollable and irrational fear of marriage. It is derived from the Greek word Gamos which means marriage and phobos meaning fear.”
I have met a lot of people with all sorts of fears of marriage/commitment, such as…
A person is particularly scared of getting married, and I mean the idea of spending their whole life with a single person is daunting for them.
What causes Gamophobia???
It is typically looked at as only a man’s problem, especially because some find it hard to commit to one woman or even bring themselves to propose to their long term beloved. But I must point out, that a lot of women also suffer from it.
I mean a client was telling me the other day that a friend’s husband said he loves his wife but doesn’t understand why he can’t have turkey sometimes although he enjoys chicken.
You also find that these types of people, live with their partners, have children but never get married, because of the fear that marriage will curse the relationship or the other party will change and all sorts.
Some factors that causes it are personal insecurities (like being heart broken, not feeling adequate enough for their partners etc), financial status and other social factors that comes along with marriage.
Even if they do manage to get married, these thoughts and fears are still lingering around. It can develop into domestic violence, pushing the other partner away, false accusations and so on.
Gamophobia occurs sometimes when the person didn’t witness good marriages around them. So this has left a bad taste in their mouth.
In my research I read that these incidents can be caused by divorce of parents during childhood, abuse from parents, seeing one’s parents or other married couples fight and quarrel, a previous marriage failure, betrayal from partner or hearing about unsuccessful marriages extensively.
Treatment for Gamophobia
It can be treated with both therapy/counselling and medications. I will also add with a lot of prayer and spiritual counselling not just any counselling.
But like I always say, if you want to be healed you have to first admit and confess that you have a problem.
What I’m saying is, if you really want to overcome the fear of marriage/commitment, you desire/need to really be ready to overcome the fear, seek the right guidance from your senior ministers and take practical steps.
Let’s stop denying what is clear and right in front of us. We will be missing out on great things in life, that we are entitled to, that God has planned for us.
May our stubbornness and inability to seek for help not hinder us from our breakthrough.
Proverbs 29:1 “He who is often reproved, yet stiffens his neck, will suddenly be broken beyond healing.”
Everything that is a success in life takes a lot of work. So just like how you want to be successful in your job and personal life, you must be ready to put the same effort into your relationships/marriage.
Marriage is an unending school, it is like entering into an unknown territory. There is no manual.
That is why we must have faith and by the grace of God, I know you can overcome this fear, as long as you are willing to be healed from the spirit of Gamophobia. Amen.
“The righteous cry, and the LORD heareth, and delivereth them out of all their troubles.”
Be blessed 😇🙏😘