I am sorry I haven’t written to you this week. Work has been overwhelming (glory be to God).
So today I want to share a conversation I had recently with a certain lady.
Me: why won’t you considered this brother, I think you’ll work. Don’t you agree?
Lady: No I am not interested.
Me: But you have great chemistry ☺️😊 WHY NOT HIM???
Lady: 😒 How can you be with someone who brings out the worst in you.
Me: 😱😨😳😲😧 WOW true talk.
In that moment it hit me. She was being wise and had paid good attention to have know this fact.
Having good chemistry doesn’t always mean it will work. These two banter a lot and the guy really likes her. But when she made this statement I looked back into so many other relationships, that I know either the guy or the lady had brought out the worst in the other.
I guess this is another thing you have to add to the list of things to look out for in your choice of spouse.
Does this person encourage you to be a better man or woman. Are they like unfortunately our dear mother Eve, who led Adam into making a bad decision in also eating of the fruits.
Gen 3:6, And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.
Or like a Abigail who’s husband Nabal nearly cost them their lives. Thank God she didn’t listen to his foolish ways and turned the situation around and pleaded for David’s mercies. Well Nabal still lost his life in the process.
One of the things I always thank God for in my husband is, no matter how unhappy I am with someone, my husband will never stop talking to them. He will tell me that is between me and the person and I should work it out and vice versa.
I know a few couple whom whereby when one is not talking or in a misunderstanding with someone, then the other also carries up the malice cross and follows the wife or husband to stop taking to the person.
In a relationship, you must be able to correct each other and set each other straight and not encourage bad behaviour.
You must avoid letting the other half develop certain traits like becoming defensive or justifying themselves all the time. Even things like the person becoming timid and unable to express themselves out of trying to remain in love.
All these things are unhealthy in a long run for the relationship.
This doesn’t only go for relationships. As I was writing it occurred to me, that they are some friendships you need to let go of. This is because the person is not bringing out the best in you. They are not fruitful in the relationship. They bring you down and make you feel insecure and like you have to match up to them all the time.
A good friend must be able to influence you for greater things and want to see you succeed as much as themselves. They must be genuinely concerned about your well being.
Once again choose wisely and don’t let CHEMISTRY fool you. Test the spirit behind the potential spouse. Don’t just look at what it looks like on the surface. Look deeper!
Be blessed and as always, this is